With the Ryan Lochte drama of week 1 behind us, it’s time to focus on the dancing. It’s also time to channel your favorite television character, because tonight our couples are dancing to TV’s greatest theme songs…and also Go, Diego Go! Let’s get real: Some theme songs are made for the ballroom; others, not so much. A cute quickstep to Bewitched? Sure! A sexy cha cha to a children’s cartoon? WHY?
Since no one will be eliminated until Tuesday night’s two-hour results show, everyone’s looking cool, calm, and collected. Right now, the show is all about having fun — and maybe not getting any more fives from the judges. Fingers crossed!
Maureen McCormick and Artem Chigvintsev
Quickstep, The Brady Bunch Theme
Isn’t Maureen the loveliest? Girl just wants to dance. Of course, Maureen will be dancing her way through The Brady Bunch theme song this week, and even better: Florence Henderson is back to support her former costar, both in rehearsals and on the ballroom floor. The most impressive thing, though, is how much I now want Artem to star in a ’60s-style sitcom. That man can cheese it up with the best of them! Overall, the judges think Maureen has improved a great deal since her last dance and are surprised by how at ease she looks on the dance floor. A few technical kinks to work out and she’ll be moving up that leaderboard in no time.
Judges’ Score: 26/40
Jana Kramer and Gleb Savchenko
Tango, “I Don’t Want to Be” by Gavin DeGraw (theme from One Tree Hill)
Jana is using TV week to pay homage to her One Tree Hill character, Alex, but we all know Alex was the worst. Don’t come at Brooke Davis, ya heard? To really make this OTH celebration pop, the man, the myth, the one-time DWTS contestant Gavin DeGraw is in the ballroom to sing the theme song live. It’s unfortunate that on such a big night, Jana is dealing with a major injury: She pulled some muscles between her ribs and is dancing through the pain. The judges commend her for fighting through it, but could tell she was holding back. Her natural dance ability and intensity are enough to earn her decent scores, though.
Judges’ Score: 29/40
Rick Perry and Emma Slater
Quickstep, Green Acres Theme
Whatever you think of Rick and Emma’s quickstep, never forget it gave us a giant bedazzled pitchfork. You guys, if I knew pitchforks could be that fabulous, farming could’ve been a real option for me. Another missed opportunity! Like Maureen, the former Texas governor seems much more at ease this week. He’s actually having fun. Rick Perry is a quickstep guy! Who knew? Carrie Ann thought the performance was fun, and for what Rick lacks in artistry, he almost makes up for with his unbridled enthusiasm. Bruno, however, is stuck on the lack of finesse in Rick’s footwork. But, like, who needs fancy footwork? What is this, a dancing competition or something? Oh, right.
Judges’ Score: 22/40
Calvin Johnson Jr. and Lindsay Arnold
Foxtrot, Family Matters Theme
A lot of wonderful things occurred on DWTS’s TV night, but perhaps the greatest is when Megatron met Steven Q. Urkel. After Calvin and Lindsay perform a fun, lively foxtrot to the Family Matters theme song, Jaleel White comes out to surprise Calvin, who’s apparently his biggest fan. It is the most unexpected but delightful bromance to ever hit the dance floor. Speaking of dancing, Calvin is definitely more of a Stefan Urquelle with his charming and very competent dance skills. The judges see improvement, and Carrie Ann speaks for all of us when she tells Calvin he’s “so darn cute,” giant suspenders and all.
Judges’ Score: 28/40
NEXT: Dancing is coming